Healthy Relationships, and When Something Is Not Safe
In a healthy relationship both people feel respected, safe and free to be themselves. Abuse can be physical, emotional, sexual or financial, and it can also be controlling behavior, like threatening to report someone to immigration or taking their documents.
Warning signs
- Your partner controls your money, phone or who you see
- Threats, humiliation or constant blame
- Fear of their anger
- Pressure for sex or other things you do not want
- Threats to take the children or call immigration
What you can do
- Remember that abuse is never your fault
- Tell a trusted person, a counselor or a doctor
- Make a safety plan: a safe place to go, copies of important papers and phone numbers you know by heart
- Call or chat with the National Domestic Violence Hotline at 1-800-799-7233, or text START to 88788. Spanish is available
- Many domestic violence programs help people regardless of immigration status
When to reach out
If you are in immediate danger, call 911. If the person might see your phone, use a safe device and clear your browsing history.
Free worksheets
Download free, bilingual worksheets you can use at home or bring to a session.
See free worksheetsFrequently asked questions
What signs should I notice?
Your partner controls your money, phone or who you see; Threats, humiliation or constant blame; Fear of their anger; Pressure for sex or other things you do not want; Threats to take the children or call immigration.
What can help?
Remember that abuse is never your fault; Tell a trusted person, a counselor or a doctor; Make a safety plan: a safe place to go, copies of important papers and phone numbers you know by heart; Call or chat with the National Domestic Violence Hotline at 1-800-799-7233, or text START to 88788. Spanish is available; Many domestic violence programs help people regardless of immigration status.
When should I look for help?
If you are in immediate danger, call 911. If the person might see your phone, use a safe device and clear your browsing history.
Where can I find help in Spanish in Oregon?
Use the Sanar Network directory to find bilingual and culturally responsive providers in Oregon, or read our resource guide for crisis lines, therapy, addiction help and health insurance by county.
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